Connection Central

by Rick Warren

"For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline" (2 Timothy 1:7 NIV).

When we're full of fear and anxiety, we don't get close to each other. We back off from each other. We're afraid of being rejected, manipulated, vulnerable, hurt, or used. All of these fears cause us to disconnect in life.

This fear is as old as humanity. When Adam and Eve sinned, and God came looking for them, Adam said, "I was afraid . . . so I hid" (Genesis 3:10 NIV). People have been doing that ever since. We're afraid, so we hide. We hide our true selves.

We don't let people know what we're really like. We don't let them see the inside of us. Why? Because if we let people know what we're like and they don't like it, we're up a creek without a paddle. Tough luck. Why am I afraid to tell you who I am? Because if I tell you who I am, and you don't like me, I'm in for it. I have no alternative. So we wear masks and we pretend.

Fear does three terrible things to relationships:

1. Fear makes us defensive. We're afraid to reveal ourselves. We defend ourselves. When people point out our weaknesses, we retaliate and defend ourselves.

2. Fear keeps us distant. We don't let people get close to us. We want to withdraw, pull back. We want to hide our emotions. We don't want to be open and honest. We become defensive and distant.

3. Fear makes us demanding. Whenever we're insecure, and the more insecure we are, the more we try to control. So we try to have the last word in a relationship. We try to dominate, control. It's always a symptom of fear and insecurity.

Where do you get the confidence, the courage, to take the first step in connecting with someone, to go into a deeper intimacy? Where do you get that courage?

You get it from God's Spirit in your life. Paul tells us in 2 Timothy 1:7, "For the Holy Spirit, God's gift, does not want you to be afraid of people but to be wise and strong (courageous), and to love them and enjoy being with them" (LB).

How do you know when you're filled with God's Spirit? You're more courageous in your relationships. You love people. You enjoy being with them. You're not afraid of them because God's Spirit is in your life. The Bible says "God is love," and "Love casts out all fear." The more of God you have in your life, the less of fear you're going to have in your life.

So the starting point in connecting with anybody is to pause, pray, and say, "God, give me the courage to take the first step." You need to do that now with a person you want to connect with.

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At Word Alive it has become customary to take the seventh or "Sabbath" month of the year to rest, refresh, and renew. All services during the month of July will be suspended. Services will resume Sunday, August 2.

In our first year the Lord spoke to Kent about taking the faith step of a Sabbath month. We encouraged people to visit other churches, have devotions with the family, take vacation time, and learn to maintain our relationship with the Lord outside church "services". We found that this God-idea worked to break possessive and controlling spirits prevalent in the religious community and reinforced our commitment to resist having church services for the sake of "offerings".

We have found the Lord faithful to provide, sustain, and strengthen the church even while "services" are suspended. We anticipate this year to be like each year before. We will come back refreshed, increased, and ready to run the race of faith. And don't forget: when you come back, you will enter this new season through the glass doors of Our Connection.

Enjoy your Sabbath celebration!

Meeting with Small Group Leader's Meeting this evening. We will be touring The Connection. I'll be unloading pictures to Twitter during the tour.

The following is an excerpt from The Strangest Secret by Earl Nightingale.

George Bernard Shaw said, "People are always blaming their circumstances for what they are. I don't believe in circumstances. The people who get on in this world are the people who get up and look for the circumstances they want, and if they can't find them, they make them."

Well, it's pretty apparent, isn't it? And every person who discovered this believed (for a while) that he was the first one to work it out. We become what we think about.

Conversely, the person who has no goal, who doesn't know where he's going, and whose thoughts must therefore be thoughts of confusion, anxiety and worry - his life becomes one of frustration, fear, anxiety and worry. And if he thinks about nothing... he becomes nothing.

How does it work? Why do we become what we think about? Well, I'll tell you how it works, as far as we know. To do this, I want to tell you about a situation that parallels the human mind.

Suppose a farmer has some land, and it's good, fertile land. The land gives the farmer a choice; he may plant in that land whatever he chooses. The land doesn't care. It's up to the farmer to make the decision.

We're comparing the human mind with the land because the mind, like the land, doesn't care what you plant in it. It will return what you plant, but it doesn't care what you plant.

Now, let's say that the farmer has two seeds in his hand- one is a seed of corn, the other is nightshade, a deadly poison. He digs two little holes in the earth and he plants both seeds-one corn, the other nightshade. He covers up the holes, waters and takes care of the land...and what will happen? Invariably, the land will return what was planted.

As it's written in the Bible, "As ye sow, so shall ye reap."

Remember the land doesn't care. It will return poison in just as wonderful abundance as it will corn. So up come the two plants - one corn, one poison.

The human mind is far more fertile, far more incredible and mysterious than the land, but it works the same way. It doesn't care what we plant...success...or failure. A concrete, worthwhile goal...or confusion, misunderstanding, fear, anxiety and so on. But what we plant it must return to us.

You see, the human mind is the last great unexplored continent on earth. It contains riches beyond our wildest dreams. It will return anything we want to plant.

Alvin Slaughter will be at Word Alive in Oxford at the 9AM and 11:15AM and then at 6PM at Word Alive in Gadsden. See www.waio.org for more info.

One of my all-time favorite quotes is...."Customer service is not a department, it's an attitude."

How true it is! As much as we try to complicate what great service is...it's really pretty simple: It is giving more than the customer expects...consistently. You notice I said simple, not easy. There is a big difference.

Enjoy the Chapter I titled: "A Crash Course on Customer Service."

Excerpt from
Customer Love,
by Mac Anderson

The 10 phrases from my friends at Walk the Talk are an illuminating reminder of how uncomplicated it is to make customers feel loved. People don't care how much you know, (or what you sell, or what type of service you provide) until they know how much you care!

The 10 most important words:
"I apologize for our mistake. Let me make it right."

When something goes wrong, most people merely want to be heard and acknowledged. So listen, apologize, then ask what you can do to make it right.

The 9 most important words:
"Thank you for your business. Please come back again."

Repeat customers cost less than new customers and are often more loyal.

The 8 most important words:
"I'm not sure, but I will find out."

It's ok if you don't know the answer; it's not ok to make the customer keep searching for it. That's your job.

The 7 most important words:
"What else can I do for you?"

Be prepared to go the extra mile, there is less competition there.

The 6 most important words:
"What is most convenient for you?"

Your customers will be pleasantly surprised when you ask what's convenient for them.

The 5 most important words:
"How may I serve you?"

This question reinforces your role in the relationship. Play that role the best you can.

The 4 most important words:
"How did we do?"

Feedback is critical! Your customers have a unique perspective and they appreciate being asked.

The 3 most important words:
"Glad you're here!"

Customers who feel welcome spend more time, more money and are more likely to return.

The 2 most important words:
"Thank you."

Basic manners... but how often do you get thanked when you're the customer?

The MOST important word:
"Yes."

Become a yes person.

Live with Passion,

Mac Anderson
Founder, Simple Truths

MAC ANDERSON is the founder of Simple Truths and Successories, Inc., the leader in designing and marketing products for motivation and recognition. These companies, however, are not the first success stories for Mac. He was also the founder and CEO of McCord Travel, the largest travel company in the Midwest, and part owner/VP of sales and marketing for Orval Kent Food Company, the country's largest manufacturer of prepared salads.
His accomplishments in these three unrelated industries provide some insight into his passion and leadership skills. He also brings the same passion to his speaking where he speaks to many corporate audiences on a variety of topics, including leadership, motivation and team building.
Mac has authored or co-authored twelve books, which have sold more than 3 million copies. They include: 212°...The Extra Degree, Change is Good...You Go First, You Can't Send a Duck to Eagle School, The Power of Attitude, The Essence of Leadership, The Nature of Success, The Dash, Charging the Human Battery, Finding Joy, Customer Love, Motivational Quotes and Learning to Dance in the Rain.
For more information about Mac, visit www.simpletruths.com.
Simple Truths, LLC., 1952 McDowell Road, Ste. 205, Naperville, IL 60563, USA
Phone: 800-900-3427 / 630-946-1460
Copyright 2008, Simple Truths, LLC. All rights reserved.

by Rick Warren

"God wants to do something incredible through you. But he’s going to start by dealing with
your past." - Rick Warren

God uses all kinds of vessels – big ones, little ones, ornate ones, plain ones, expensive ones, and ordinary ones. He uses all kinds of personalities, backgrounds, and experiences. But there is one kind of vessel God will not use. He will not use a dirty vessel. Pastor, if you’re going to be used by God, you’re going to have to do a little clean-up work first.

The Bible says in 2 Timothy 2:21 (NLT), “If you keep yourself pure, you will be a special utensil for honorable use. Your life will be clean, and you will be ready for the Master to use you for every good work.”

More than anything, pastor, I know you want to be used by God. It isn’t the best preachers who get used by God. It isn’t the best leaders. It isn’t the most spiritual pastors. God uses those leaders who regularly get right with him.

Joshua told the people, “Purify yourselves for tomorrow the Lord will do great wonders among you” (Joshua 3:5 NLT). If you want God to do something great in your future, you’ve got to start by settling the accounts of the past.

It doesn’t mean you have to be perfect – because no one is. But it does mean you need to be quick to confess and receive forgiveness when needed. Augustine said, “The confession of bad works is the beginning of good works.” God wants to do something incredible through you. But he’s going to start by dealing with your past. You’ve got to confess your sin to him.

I remember one of the first times in my life when a need for confession really blocked what God wanted to do through my ministry.

My walk with God had gotten dull. There was no joy. There was no thrill to it. It was just kind of ho-hum. When I prayed, I felt like my prayers just bounced across the ceiling. I didn’t feel close to God. I didn’t feel close to anybody.

Finally, I knew that I had to do something. I was 17 or 18 years old, and I was still living at home. It was about ten o’clock at night. Everybody had gone to bed. I got out a yellow pad and said, “OK God, let’s do some business here. I need to do a little spring cleaning. I need to know anything that’s between you and me. I’m going to make a sin list of everything you tell me.”

Within a few seconds, I just started thinking of things that I knew were wrong in my life. Times I’d been jealous. Lies I’d told. Times I’d been impatient. I filled up three pages with my sin. Knowing 1 John 1:9, I knew that God would be faithful and just to forgive all of the sins I’d committed. I thought I’d just burn the paper once I was finished. I certainly didn’t want anyone to read it! But there were three sins that related to other people. I knew I had to make restitution to those people.

I began a battle in my mind with God that night. I did not want to make restitution. I told God I’d do anything to not have to confront those people. It would be humbling and embarrassing. But God made it clear that this was going to be a test of my integrity.

The next day, a Saturday, I did everything but make restitution for those sins. I did my homework. I cleaned my room. I washed both my parents’ cars. I cleaned up the patio. I did errands for my mom. I did everything but what God really wanted me to do.

That night I was supposed to be a guest speaker at a youth rally about 30 minutes from my house. I shouldn’t have spoken at that rally. I was out of fellowship with God and with other people. God’s presence and his power weren’t there. My words were just bouncing off the walls.

As I was driving back home that night, I got right with God. I told him I was sorry and was willing to make things right. When I got home, my parents and little sister were watching television. I turned off the TV and, in tears, told my family everything about those three sins I needed to make restitution for. I asked them to pray that I would have the strength to make those things right. And I did. As I was honest with God and got things right with him, I felt the power of God fall on my life as I never had before. I could feel the blessing of God flowing into my life.

Pastor, I want you to have that. You have no idea how much God wants to use your life. But you have to come clean first. Here are six steps that’ll put you on the path to a clear conscious – and a ministry that God will bless.

Review every area of your life. Get away with a Bible, a piece of paper, and a pen, and ask God to let you know what’s coming between you and him. Don’t rush it. Take your time and write it all down. Nobody will see this. It’s between you and God.

Repent of every sin. Take responsibility for every sin you’ve written down. Don’t rationalize them. Don’t minimize them. Tell God what you did was a sin and you won’t do it anymore. Real repentance isn’t apologizing for your sin. It’s admitting it, turning away from it, and accepting God’s grace for it.

Make restitution. As you make your list, notice the sins that have impacted other people. Maybe you’ve hurt someone or mistreated him. If the person is still alive, make it right – as soon as possible. Don’t just apologize either. If you’ve stolen from the person, give back what you’ve taken. If you’ve cheated somebody, repay him.

Receive God’s forgiveness. Now you’re ready to receive God’s forgiveness. The Bible says you can go boldly to the throne of God and receive grace and mercy. God won’t reject you or scold you. He’ll give you his grace. That’s a promise from his Word.

Reveal your faults to a friend. You need to come clean with someone. If you don’t come clean with another person, you’ll still be forgiven. But coming clean to another person is part of the process God uses to heal us emotionally. Find another person that you trust (maybe another pastor) and let him know what you’ve done.

Repeat these steps regularly. Confession is like a bath. If you don’t take one regularly, you’ll start to stink. Make confession a regular habit in your life. Pastor, God wants to bless your life and your ministry. Will you get right with him – today?

Article by Rick Warren reprinted from Rick Warren's Minstry Toolbox. Rick Warren is the founding pastor of Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, Calif., one of America's largest and best-known churches. In addition, Rick is author of the New York Times best seller The Purpose Driven Life and The Purpose Driven Church, which was named one of the 100 Christian books that changed the 20th century. He is also founder of Pastors.com, a global Internet community for ministers. Copyright © 2009 Rick Warren